Jesus Walks

Kanye West will appear on the cover of the next issue of Rolling Stone, posed as Jesus, complete with a crown of thorns atop his head. I'm sure once this issue comes out, there will be plenty of righteous indignation coming to a Fox News Channel near you. But rather than pile on Mr. West, I thought I'd examine the parallels between the rapper and the savior. Here's what Kanye West and Jesus Christ have in common:

Both keep it real.

Both spoke out for the rights of the poor and needy.

Jesus had masses following him at the sermon on the mount. Kanye sold out the Palladium.

Both allegedly liked a little cannabis from time to time.

Both think George Bush is a total fuckup.

Neither are big fans of gold diggers.

Neither are Chinese.

So think about that before you go off on a crusade to judge Kanye West. And if that doesn't help, Kanye also admits that he's addicted to porn in his interview. Sure it's unrelated, but who can't sympathize with that?