Friday, April 13, 2007

If I Were Trump for a Day

One of the best parts about baseball season starting is that it means that the writers at Fire Joe Morgan are in full force again; and this season has been off to a great start. If it's not in your blog rotation already, I highly recommend it.

Reading the site got me to thinking: if I were given the power to fire three sports commentators, who would I chooose? While there are plenty of worthy candidates for the honor, in my opinion, these three have risen above the competition:

1. Chris Berman - Nobody sucks the joy out of sports quite like Boomer, and while Joe Buck gives him a run, no one is impressed with their own humor as much as Berman. Need a reminder of how easy it is for Berman to ruin sports? The NFL draft is in two weeks.

2. Sean Salisbury - The thought of Salisbury showing his junk to ESPN interns is both disturbing and hilarious (unless you're an ESPN intern), but that's not why I'd can him. Salisbury gets the nod because of the disparity between his arrogance and his accomplishments in the sport. It's obvious that Salisbury knows he sucks and is overcompensating- Salisbury chose not to take a job offer as QB coach in Arizona because he knew he'd be exposed as a fraud. Unfortunately, he'll never actually be fired because he fits right in with the ESPN mold of "it doesn't matter what you say, as long as you say it loudly."

3. Joe Morgan - It's not just that Morgan doesn't do any pre-game research, it's that he flaunts that he chooses not to watch game film. It's not just that Morgan hates statistics, he actually believes it makes him more insightful to ignore information. It's not just that Morgan makes only very obvious, very cliche points. It's that he feels compelled to repeat the exact same point ad nauseum within the game. I know seniority means everything in announcing, but I don't understand why ESPN continues to employ him as their lead analyst. There are plenty of ESPN people I'd rather hear instead such as Orel Hershiser, Rick Sutcliffe, or Harold Reynolds (oops). Heck I'd rather hear the Sports Gal call games than Morgan. Joe Morgan's role as lead commentator for ESPN is the best reason to get the MLB Extra Innings package.

While it happens that all of these announcers work for ESPN/ABC Sports, I don't mean to pick on ESPN this time. Since ESPN has the most sports coverage, it's logical that they'd have the most personalities to criticize. But CBS (Nantz, Packer, Dierdorff, Sharpe), Fox (Buck), and NFLN (Sanders) all have worthy candidates.

I'm more interested tho in what you guys have to say. You're given the chance to fire three sports personalities. Who gets the guillotine?



At Fri Apr 13, 02:52:00 PM PDT , Blogger NFL Adam said...

You let Buck off easy.

At Sat Apr 14, 08:40:00 PM PDT , Blogger Zach Landres-Schnur said...

agreed with adam.

1. buck
2. mccarver
3. brenneman
4. james brown
5. joe buck
6. jeanne zelasko
7. buck

At Sat Apr 14, 10:35:00 PM PDT , Blogger Matt said...

At Sat Apr 14, 11:08:00 PM PDT , Blogger insomniac said...

Wow, Zach- Fox Baseball must be a brutal experience for you.

You sure you don't want to add Kevin Kennedy to the list for the sake of completion?

At Sun Apr 15, 08:03:00 PM PDT , Blogger Pacifist Viking said...

1. Al Michaels. It's not that I hate him or that he's anywhere near the worst announcer out there. But something about the way he presents information, and the things he focuses on, and the things he mentions, deteriorates from my enjoyment of the game (and he's usually covering big games).

2. Joe Buck. He's got similar ability to overtake what should be an enjoyable game to watch.

3. Tony Siragusa. Why does he get access to chime in with whatever he wants from the sidelines?

If you asked this question two years ago, my list would have been 1. Paul McGuire and 2. Joe Theismann. Time to be thankful for the little things (but I always liked Mike Patrick--he was always so shocked and amazed by what was going on, he got me to be a little bit excited about it, too).

At Sat Apr 21, 05:42:00 AM PDT , Anonymous Fox 71 said...

I almost always watch TV games with the sound off. (Try it some time - do you really need to hear the color man's anecdote about when he played?)

Anyway, the guys for me are Morgan and McCarver. They are more than just annoying. They are wrong much of the time.


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