In the Eye of the Beholder

In honor of yesterday's hoops, this post will be hopelessley scattered, lacking any sense of rhythm or flow...

The last time Memphis and UCLA met in a significant tournament game, Bill Walton went 21 for 22 from the field. Yesterday in Oakland, UCLA had 14 field goals total as a team.

The record low 95 points in the UCLA vs Memphis game has overshadowed the offensive ineptitude displayed for 40 minutes in the LSU/Texas game. If Texas' Paulino hadn't hit that three point shot to send the game into overtime, LSU and Texas would have ended with a 52-49 final score- which for two hours would have made it the lowest scoring regional final since the advent of the shot clock era.

Early prediction for the LSU/UCLA game: Arron Afflalo hits a free throw to put the Bruins ahead by one with 8:30 remaining in the game. Neither team scores for the rest of the contest, and UCLA advances to the championship by a final score of 17-16.

Karma? Earlier this year, LSU fans and UCLA fans were united in their petty efforts to set the record straight regarding USC's OnePeat in football. Now, one of these two schools will be playing for a basketball championship banner.

When asked during the press conference to hold up the trophy for winning the Regional finals, UCLA's Jordan Farmar refused. "At UCLA, no other banners but national championships go up. We haven't really done anything in the eyes of UCLA and UCLA fans."

In less than a five-minute span, LSU's Glen "Big Baby" Davis went from cussing out the Texas fans (m*thaf*ckas! m*thaf*ckas!), to telling the world he had tapeworms, and thanking God for making it all possible.

As much as JJ Redick and Adam Morrison likely had their stock fall in the eyes of NBA GMs, LSU's Tyrus Thomas looks to me to have solidified a spot in the top 5 of this June's draft.

Spotted on a UCLA blog:

Dear Mr. Hollins:

I officially apologize for every negative thing I ever thought or said about you. I was wrong, and I hope you can find it in your enormously wonderful heart to forgive me. I can be a better person, just give me a second chance.

Sincerely,

Everybody

Checking travel sites, it's looking damn near impossible to get out to Indy for the Final Four. My only consolation is the knowledge that Peyton Manning is Indianapolis' personal greeter.

By the way, if Peyton Manning and Danica Patrick were to have a child, it would grow up to be just like Sasha Cohen, who fell apart once again in her final performance.

Unable to book a flight, I've considered driving my Chevy down to Indianapolis. But seeing as how Coach K is their spokesman, I'm more than a little concerned that the car would breakdown before it even got halfway there.

The second half of the Final Four will be set in a few hours. If it's half as exciting as yesterday's games...well, it might be time to flip over to the Players Championship and hope for a few golf balls to fly into a pond for some excitement.