Half the League's Fans Can Go Ahead and Give Up Hope Now

The NFL has to be happy that the Giants-Cowboys shootout was the last impression left on football fans Sunday. Hopefully the scoring bonanza will help erase the memory that up to that point, the games were noteworthy mostly for their pathetic offense. Over half (15) of the teams that have played thus far in week 1 have scored no more than one offensive touchdown, including six offenses that never reached the end zone. The Seattle Mariners outscored 10 teams today. The one silver lining to all of this offensive ineptitude is that maybe Fantasy Football will lose some of its popularity, and people will turn their focus on purer reasons to watch football games, such as gambling...

Today's games lacked continuity and direction, and so shall this post. A few observations:

Vince Young has thrown for under 100 yards in four of his career starts. Amazingly, he is 3-1 in those games...

More random stats: Marc Bulger averaged 3.97 yards per passing attempt. LaDanian Tomlinson averaged 1.47 yards per carry. LaDanian Tomlinson has more TD passes than Brett Favre. Mario Williams has more TDs than Reggie Bush...

Bigger upset over the weekend: South Florida over Auburn, South Carolina over Georgia, or Bonnie Bernstein looking better than Erin Andrews? Bonnie looks like she spent the offseason hitting the gym with Eddie "Guns" Hochuli. Meanwhile, even Jenna Jameson thinks Erin needs to eat something...

If you put together the rosters of the Cleveland Browns, Kansas City Chiefs, and Tampa Buccaneers, would you be able to produce a team that was capable of winning half of its games?

Brandon Jacobs set a goal for himself of 1500 yards rushing this season. If his injury is as bad as it looked, he's going to end up just 1,474 yards short of that goal...

Other impactful injuries: Orlando Pace, possibly gone for the year; Jason Ferguson, out for the year; Jon Jansen, likely out for the year; Lito Sheppard, sprained knee- MRI scheduled; Eli Manning, bruised labia.

In a few years, we will be wondering how Adrian Peterson slipped down to #7 overall in the 2007 draft in the same way that we now look at LaDanian Tomlinson slipping to #5 in the 2001 draft. Interestingly, in both years, Cleveland and Arizona had the opportunity to select the difference-making backs, but chose linemen instead. Maybe that's why they're picking in the top 10 every year...

Top 5 rookie performances Sunday:
1. Adrian Peterson: 19 carries, 103 yards; 1 catch, 60 yards, 1 TD: 1 KR, 22 yds.
2. Marshawn Lynch: 19 carries, 90 yards, 1 TD; 2 catches, 9 yards.
3. Mason Crosby: 3/3 FG, including 53 yds and GW FG.
4. Reggie Nelson: 7 Tackles, 1 sack, 1 Forced Fumble.
5. Calvin Johnson: 4 catches, 90 yards, 1 TD.

So that's what Randy Moss can do on the field when he isn't stoned? Impressive. Definitely worth a 4th pick...

Romeo Crennel has not yet announced who will be his starting quarterback in week 2. He needs to find a three-sided coin before he can make his decision.

Hopefully teams are just shaking off some rust, and the quality of play will improve within the next few weeks. If not, someone should get on the phone with Troy Glaus or Rick Ankiel or Barry Bonds or Jay Gibbons to see if they have any pointers.