Friday, January 25, 2008

The Sexiest Finals in Grand Slam History

Tennis is the only major sport (unless you count volleyball as a major sport) where the women's game is far more compelling than the men's. One of the reasons is because the serve in the men's game has become too powerful, making the extended volley all but obsolete. But in reality, the reason the women's game is better is because it features fit young females running around in skirts or dresses. Can't ask for more than that.

Well actually, you can. I suppose you could ask that the most attractive players in the game also be the best players in the game. While there have always been attractive women throughout tennis history, there has always been a dominant player like Billie Jean King, Martina Navratilova, Aranxta Sanchez Vicario, Venus Williams, etc. that have prevented the grand slam events from featuring a finals matchup of two attractive players. In fact, tonight's final of Maria Sharapova vs Ana Ivanovic is the sexiest finals matchup since the events began to be televised, and it's not even close. Since 1970, here are the hottest grand slam finals to date:

5. 1976 French Open: Sue Barker vs Renata Tomanova
Barker was a cute 5'3 Brit who reached as high as #3 in the overall rankings. Playing in the same era as Martina Navratilova, Billie Jean King, and Evonne Goolagong, she and Chris Evert were one of the few players of that time where you didn't have to worry about seeing a bulge when their skirts flipped up. Barker reached a Grand Slam final once, where she faced Renata Tomanova, a Czech player who would have been much hotter if she lived in the Prague of today, where instead of being trained for the olympics, young women are beautified for porn and overseas marriages.

4. 1979 US Open: Tracy Austin vs Chris Evert Lloyd
Tracy Austin was only 16 when this match took place, but nonetheless she was challenging Chris Evert for the role of America's sweetheart in tennis. Austin won the match but her pigtails never won over fan's hearts.

3. 1988 Australian Open: Steffi Graf vs Chris Evert Lloyd
Steffi Graf was the first German to come onto the scene who hadn't spent the last decade being shot up by hormones. Maybe her face wasn't the cutest ever, but she grew into her looks and was far more fetching than Martina Navratilova.

2. 1991 Wimbledon: Steffi Graf vs Gabriela Sabatini
Sabatini and Graf faced each other three times in Grand Slam finals, with Graf taking two out of three. Gabriela had a rocking body, but was forever cursed by that perm-mullet hybrid thing she had on her head. But when professionally stylized, she was one of the hottest athletes of her generation. Once the Argentinian became aware of the marketing power of her sex appeal, her skills began to decline, and she pursued other commercial interests, including launching her own line of fragances. In a way, she was the Anna Kournikova of her time, except she was actually good for awhile.

1. 2008 Australian Open: Ana Ivanovic vs Maria Sharapova
I'll let the pictures tell the story here:


Enjoy watching history.


At Fri Jan 25, 05:52:00 PM PST , Anonymous johnsmith said...

Have you considered Hingis-Kournikova teaming up in the doubles final at the 2002 Aussie Open to defeat Hantuchova-Vicario? Yummy!

At Fri Jan 25, 06:14:00 PM PST , Blogger insomniac said...

I was only thinking about Singles finals when I made the list. You're right- that Hingis/Kournikova pairing was a dream team.

At Sat Jan 26, 03:24:00 PM PST , Blogger NFL Adam said...

I don't think any other matched this one for sheer hotness. In fact, it might not be close.

At Sat Jan 26, 04:28:00 PM PST , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not to be a stickler...but unless these two met up 10 years ago...the #1 should be 2008. Figured you'd want to leave a good impression on first time viewers.

At Sat Jan 26, 04:43:00 PM PST , Blogger insomniac said...

1998 was actually a pretty good year for me. But I guess I should try living in the present.

Thanks for the correction, anon.

At Mon Jan 28, 05:17:00 PM PST , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for writing interesting things and posting just as interesting photos. 1998 was a good year for all of us. I shouldn't have invested in though...

At Mon Sep 13, 10:59:00 AM PDT , Anonymous Hattie said...

So many crotches, so little time.

At Mon Nov 18, 08:33:00 AM PST , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, horny teenager have you ever been to Prague or you're busy of jerking????


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