Speed Needs No Translation

As a tribute to the opening of "The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift," and because I'm once again short on time, here's a speed round recap of the world of sports (and by world, I mean US, and not hockey):

Fast Lane: A's pitcher Esteban Loaiza was arrested for driving 120 mph in his ferrari and suspicion of drunken driving at 3:30 am Wednesday morning. Loaiza's defense will be that a speed gun has never been able to register above 88 mph on him before, so they must have the wrong guy. Starting the year with a 1-3 record and 6.89 era, this arrest might be the best contribution he could make for the A's if it gives them any opportunity to void a portion of his 3 year, $21 million contract.

Fast and Tight: In New York, Randy Johnson was ejected for a high and inside pitch that didn't hit Eduardo Perez. Meanwhile, White Sox rookie pitcher Sean Tracy is reportedly going to be demoted to the minors for failing to follow manager Ozzie Guillen's orders and hit Rangers' slugger Hank Blalock. After throwing two pitches inside that missed Blalock, Tracy induced Blalock to ground out. Guillen pulled Tracy from the game and went ballistic in the dugout. While being sent to the minors is certainly an unpleasant punishment, it could have been worse for Tracy. He could have been traded to the Royals.

Fastball Flurry: In the same Rangers/White Sox game, Texas starter Vicente Padilla went old school on Guillen's lineup. Really old school. Like 1st grade, little league, old school. The first pitch he threw in the game was a fastball. So was the one after that. And so were the next 48 pitches he threw. For those with a hangover, that would make 50 consecutive fastballs to start the game. Despite being unable to go number two, Padilla shutout out the White Sox. No wonder Ozzie Guillen was in such a bad mood.

Fasttrack to Success: The Dodgers called up prospect Chad Billingsley and he will make his major league debut tonight versus the Padres. Dodgers fans haven't been this excited about a homegrown pitching prospect since Edwin Jackson and Darren Dreifort! Oops.

Fast Hook: When Angels starter Bartolo Colon comes off of the DL, there is a possibility that the team will return Jered Weaver to the minors. All Weaver has done since being called up is win four consecutive games and post a 1.37 ERA. If Jered does in fact get sent down, it will be in part because his brother Jeff (3-9, 6.15 ERA) is being granted a spot in the rotation because of the $8+ mil he is making. The Angels would serve themselves well to look up to their neighbors to the north and recall when the Dodgers had both Ramon and Pedro Martinez on their squad and opted to keep Ramon while demoting, and later trading, Pedro Martinez. I will give the Angels a little credit tho and say that Bill Stoneman isn't dumb enough to actually trade Jered. But, the Marlins and A's might want to get on the phone and offer Willis and Zito respectively. Ya know, just in case.