A Committment to Slightly Above Averageness

After unceremoniously rejecting an offer from Pink Taco for the naming rights to their new stadium, the Arizona Cardinals have reached a 20 year agreement with the University of Phoenix, the nations largest university franchise (over 200,000 served!). Brian Mueller, president of the UoP's parent company said it is all part of a new branding campaign that will "lend more credibility to the students who earn degrees from here." Yes, because when I think of companies that buy the rights to stadiums- Enron, Adelphia- credibility and integrity are the first things that come to my mind.

Personally, I think buying stadium rights makes the University of Phoenix less like Princeton and more like Papa John's. Nevertheless, it is a very appropriate name for the stadium that houses the Arizona Cardinals. After listening to all suitors, they found the one organization that embodies everything the Cards stand for- mediocrity, false hope, and empty promises. Much like a student goes to the University of Phoenix thinking one day they'll be a veterinarian only to find themselves three years later working as a groomer at PetSmart, the Arizona Cardinals are annually everyone's team to watch out for in the preseason and then within 3 games their QB has fumbled 8 times and the team opts to let a rookie lead them. It's a match made in heaven.