Premature Speculations

You can't ever make too much of a preseason performance in the NFL, but one thing that has become apparant over the last few weeks is that the Detroit Lions really, really stink. They're so bad that they actually made Aaron Brooks look like a legitimate QB this evening. That just shouldn't happen. Ever.

One of the things that makes the NFL so fan-friendly is its parity. Every team seems to have a shot at the beginning of the season. Unfortunately, Lions fans (are there still Lions fans?) know that there only experience with parity will be in their equal footing with the Buffalo Bills to land the #1 pick in the 2007 draft. Given the Lions' recent history with first round draft picks, that isn't much of a consolation.

Other observations, courtesy of the NFL Network:

-In the Bears/Cardinals game, the hometown Arizona announcers mentioned that in the offseason, the Cardinals new stadium will be the site of eight proms. That's just perfect. Every spring, teenagers will be losing their virginity in Pink Taco stadium. And yes, I know it makes me old that I would even consider the notion that these days there are actually some teenagers who were still virgins by their senior prom. But if nothing else, they could break into the locker room and do it on Kurt Warner's bible. That would be a first...

-Chester Taylor and Edgerrin James look to be in a tight competition for biggest free agent flop this season. While Taylor has been trudging along at around two yards a carry, James currently has the "edge" (get it?) in this battle, having carried the ball 7 times so far this preseason for a grand total of one yard. Vikings and Cardinals management might want to see if they can put a stop payment on those signing bonus checks.

-In news that noone cares about but me, undrafted rookie QB Drew Olson (UCLA) saw his first action in an NFL game, going 1/2 for 18 yards. He'll likely be cut next week, but at least he'll have that training camp of development with "offensive genius" Brian Billick to fall back on...

-Lastly, the Patriots have given Deion Branch one week to negotiate a contract and trade with other teams. The Vikings and Eagles may be interested, however it's doubtful that they'll meet either Branch's contract demands or the Patriots' trade requirements (likely a first round pick). So while on the surface, this might look like the Patriots are trying to get rid of Branch, in reality they're just trying to force Branch to get a reality check on his actual value around the league. I expect him to be in a Patriots uniform by the season opener once he realizes that just because Tom Jackson loves him, it doesn't mean every GM in the league is clamoring for him.