Monday, March 31, 2008

The Road to San Antonio Needs a Few More Rest Stops

I just got back from Phoenix, and my eyes are blurry from staring at the road for six hours. So I think a real update is going to have to wait until after I get some sleep. (By the way, here's a travelling tip: Never share a hotel room with someone who wakes up at 6 am on their own accord; and if you do, make sure you have a good attorney specializing in homicide cases. Trust me on this one.)

In the meantime, here are a couple of images that quickly remind me that the trip was well worth it:


Thursday, March 27, 2008

The Detroit Tigers Cameras Are Directed By Zalman King

As noted earlier today at With Leather, Reanen Maxwell, a former scoreboard operator at Comerica Park has filed a lawsuit against the Detroit Tigers because:

"Tigers photographers routinely shot inappropriate "soft core videos" of female fans at baseball games."

The suit sounds dubious as even using the most conservative definition of "soft core," it's hard to believe that such a practice would go unnoticed in this hypersensitive and hyperhorny culture of ours. My initial instinct was to dismiss the claim as being little more than retaliation from a puritanical (and/or fat,old) former employee. But then I remembered that I still had the 9th inning of Justin Verlander's no-hitter on my Tivo, so I figured I'd rewatch it to see if there was any evidence that the claim might have any merit at all. I was shocked by what I discovered.

The first few crowd shots are pretty standard fare. Fans clapping, old men high-fiving...nothing out of the ordinary here. But if you look real closely and don't blink at the wrong time, you'll notice that after Verlander gets the 2nd out of the ninth, a cameraman does seem to focus in on one woman in particular. See for yourself:

Wow. I mean, I didn't even know Comerica had bedroom suites- these modern ballparks sure are something. I can't even show you what happens after Verlander gets the 3rd out. That footage depicts individual acts of perversion so profound and disgusting that decorum prohibits listing them here.

Someone should just cut Reanen (Ms. Maxwell, if you're nasty) a check right now.

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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Angels in Anaheim, UCLA Edition

Getting tickets right behind the UCLA bench for the first two rounds of the tournament was great for watching the players' reactions during the game and Coach Howland's energy and techniques during timeouts. But the seats were awful for anyone trying to compose a photo essay of the Dance Team during their performances. If anyone wants pics of UCLA players huddled together, email me- I have a few dozen. While I was able to snap off some pics of the Dance Team over the course of two games, it admittedly isn't my best work. But don't blame me. Blame Lorenzo Mata and Alfred Aboya, who refused to sit down during timeouts.

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